Friend/ Acquaintance Question

[ryan8029]

So I knew this kid in high school and was quite friendly with him. I always suspected he was gay and worried about how he might be doing living in the closet. I graduated and I haven't seen him since, so a year now and I just recently found out he's gay. Apparently it's a really painful situation for him, what with his Mormon parents and all. He's the nicest, sweetest person I have ever met and it made me sad to know he's in a situation like that. Anyway, my question is would it be creepy and a bit presumptuous of me to call him and see how he's doing and just tell him I'm there for him and support him? I mean, when I first started confronting my sexuality I would have been very appreciative if another gay person had done that, even if we were just acquaintances but who's to say he'll feel that way?

[Zed]

A year? And you knew him well (well enough to have his phone number anyways)? Nah, that's not creepy. I say go for it. Maybe suggest meeting up somewhere to catch up and junk. I mean, I'd think about how to start the phone call. Going "Hey! It's me from high school! How's it going? I just found out you were gay and just HAD to call!" might be a little weird. Though sometimes weird and honest works. *shrug* Or maybe find him on facebook.

[Etheric]

I think it would be a good thing to call if you wanted to. Of course, like Zed says, you don't necessarily want to be "Hey! I just heard you were gay! We should get together!" as that may be misconstrued, and besides, there's probably other things you could catch up on first that would help ease the environment.

But, yeah, I say go for it. Having an understanding ear is always helpful, and if you can provide that, do so!

[ryan8029]

Well, of course I wouldn't be like, "Hey heard you're gay...". I'm not that tactless. At least I hope not. I just don't want to come off as invasive mostly. Especially after not seeing him for a long time.

[Etheric]

Well, of course I wouldn't be like, "Hey heard you're gay...". I'm not that tactless.

Haha, I should hope not! We gays have a "fabulous" reputation to uphold.
If you genuinely would like to catch up with him, I don't see anything invasive about that. Whether he agrees to or not is within his right, but at least then you've offered. Again, an understand ear can always he helpful.

[Nomenclature]

I had a Christian friend who I found out was gay after he graduated college and moved away. It was more than a year until I messaged him on a gay networking site, and we reconnected.

Try it out.

[ryan8029]

UPDATE!

I met up with him a few weeks ago and he seemed fairly well adjusted and secure about the whole thing. Apparently his parents aren't but he's not the sort to just tell you everything he feels about anything so I don't know how he's dealing with that. On the whole though it was nice to catch up with him and see how much more secure he is with himself now. I'm sort of sounding like a stalker and I don't want anybody to get the wrong idea so I'll just wrap this up and thank everybody for their suggestions and support. Truly appreciated. :^D.